I always felt cold

So long before

You reached inside me

To see what was in store...

I was slowly recovering,

Surrounded by warmth,

Your caring affection

Taking me by storm...

I had many fears,

Wanting to treat you highly,

Your smiling face

In my dreams nightly...

Your every touch

Fully diminished my pain,

I wanted to hold you

To the hour of my bane...

Your adoring eyes

Attentive, infernal,

No matter what color,

Their depth eternal...

I've so long lived in agony,

Fearing it would never seize,

Until your warming love lulled me

Into the comfort of peace...

For some time I had dreamed

This would never be shattered,

But it had in the worst way

As if I never had mattered...

The affection of your being

You claimed was meant only for me,

Had been ruptured and stolen

By someone I've never seen...

The abysmal torment I tired from

Had finally, tenfold, come back,

As I drowned in self-loathing guilt,

My jaded heart engulfed by black...

I knew your mind inside and out,

And as you showed to hold regret,

I held in that moment to forgive you,

Yet wished we had never met...

The ghouls of insecurity followed,

Tainting my soul with that wound,

And while I hid it from all around me,

There was much more damage brewed...

And so I accept you to this day,

Yet there's no reason to be proud,

Because though it was hard to forgive you,

That one, shredding thievery still hurts me now.